Lately, being intentional seems to be a theme in my life. Maybe it’s just because that is what happens when you get older… life is less spontaneous and more deliberate. We are deliberate about the diets we follow, the books we read, the clothes we wear, and even the friends we choose to spend our weekends with. But, is being so deliberate inevitable? Can adulthood be as impromptu as childhood?
I sat in class on the first day of the fall semester and listened to a lecture by my childhood phonological disorders professor about how this is the time to get serious, be intentional, and act accordingly. She stated how competitive the field of work in speech therapy is, and how if we don’t act now, it will soon be too late to become intentional. She went around the room asking who has been carefully choosing their steps in the direction of their careers and I began to realize I haven’t even taken one step. I come and go from campus to home and often leave the thought of school behind, left to be picked back up again when I pulled up to campus the next day. But, since that time, the thought of being intentional lingers in my mind.
As many of you know, I struggle with deciding where to be intentional… especially when it comes to school and blogging. Some people are lucky enough to have a clear idea in mind when it comes to their future (a’hem, my own boyfriend). And then there are people like me, unsure. I didn’t grow up knowing what I wanted to be when I was older. My studies in communicative disorders sort of just fell into my lap, conveniently. I picked it up and ran with it. I do find my classes very interesting and I am proud to say that I study speech pathology. But, what if I am supposed to be deliberate somewhere else?
While I have spent the past month thinking about why I haven’t been intentional (or as intentional as I am told I should be) when it comes to a career in speech therapy, I noticed that being intentional has meaning in other aspects of my life, too. You of all people know, I am infatuated with blogging. I love having a website to pour my heart out onto and I love having this perfect platform to be creative. I got to thinking, if being intentional is so important to our careers… why have I not been intentional as a blogger? If this is really something to take seriously, why do I lack intentionality? This new mindset sparked something inside of me that I am eager to work with. Could this be the key to success in the blogging world? In my opinion, creating a career in blogging is one of the most difficult things to accomplish. After all, you are building everything from the ground up… on your terms, your budget, and typically all by yourself. So, why is being intentional not something on the top of our to-do lists?
I realized soon after that all of this thought about being intentional was making my head spin. Prior to that first day of fall semester, I had leaned a lot on faith, fate, and good karma. Taking a step back, it seemed silly and quite contradictory to let the idea of being intentional cause so much stress in my life.
With that said, I have also come to terms with the fact that sometimes it is okay to accept your un-intentionalities. Not everything we do has to be elaborate, well thought out, or deliberate. Because let’s be honest, finding meaning behind everything we do is a damn hard thing. Put intentionality behind things when you need to, but let intuition lead sometimes, too. Life can still be spontaneous and your future can still ride on faith without the shadow of guilt. And while intentionality may sure get you far, nothing is ever guaranteed. Don’t let the stress of what is to come take away from the specialness of now. Don’t be too worried if something in your life doesn’t seem to be on track or two steps ahead. I challenge you to consider the role intentionality plays in your own life but to never let the offhandedness of day-to-day life be suppressed… for it is the balance of both that fosters success (and sanity).